I am so excited to be going back to Southeast Asia. I cannot even describe how much, to my own surprise, I missed it while I was home. Don't get me wrong, I was so thrilled to see family and friends, understand the things that were going on around me, drive a car, eat, eat, eat some more, and eat some more!
Yet, amidst all of that, I found myself missing the climate, the people, the crazy traffic, the language, the school, the students, and even the rice of this land that has become my home.
However the moment is quickly coming when Courtney and I will step foot in Southeast Asia, get settled in our new home, and I'm going to be longing for people and things from the land of my birth and my developmental years. Now, please don't mistake what I'm saying as something fickle. I'm talking about a very real sense of grief that God has blessed me with - a grief that sees His beautiful hand at work in my present location while also longing for the people and places of blessing that God has used in my life before.
I'm on a pilgrim journey, and neither the United States nor Southeast Asia (nor anywhere else God may lead me and Courtney) is truly my "home." Indeed, the longing and anguish of "goodbye" are simply gifts that point us to another place - a Heavenly place that is being prepared for us by the Bridegroom. And from this knowledge comes the strength to savor and mourn that which is gone, embrace that which is new, and ultimately to know that no matter why God has chosen me and Courtney, where He decides to send us, what difficulties He allows to come our way, and what victories He lets us taste along the way -- through it all we run the race towards our Heavenly home, where we will walk with our Lord and cry no more, where we will "understand it better by and by."
In the meantime, I close in rejoicing with these words written by my mom to me and Courtney:
"What a privilege to let go of you to honor the Father in the collection field of little lambs for Christ!"I love you all dearly. Please never forget: He is faithful, and Courtney and I look forward to sharing more with you this year about our King of Kings.
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